How To Deal With Mother-In-Law Problems-
Marriages are one of the most renowned social institutions which are an integral part of our Indian Society. It is much more than a legal agreement as it binds together two people and their families in one big family. A successful marriage relies upon the mutual love and respect for each other along with the peaceful co-existence of their extended families together.
Generally, arranged marriages bring together the girl and the boy’s family together much before than the couple and there is a certain level of understanding and comfort for each other. So when a girl is married, she moves into an entirely new environment with different traditions & beliefs. The lifestyle and habits sometimes drastically differ from what she had observed when she was at her parent’s home.
One of the most common issues faced by the girl is the problem of mother in law and the continuous expectations from them leads to put a girl in a mental pressure where she needs to balance her life, work and family responsibilities in accordance with their in laws.
Well, here we won’t go on what are the causes of conflicts because they vary from person to person and their family. Here we will know about some ways to deal with Mother in Law problems which are essential for a daughter in law to understand. I am not saying to blindly follow all your Mother in Law instructions, but follow a certain behavior to convey certain things to them.
Listen to Her
Although it becomes difficult sometimes, but try to not bring sensitive topics which may cause a heated argument over the clash of ideologies between you and your mother in law. For instance talking about baby health and other things, if you know what is best for your child, do that only but also don’t announce it in front of your mother in law that i known what is best for my baby and I will do that. Just listen to what she needs to say. If you agree with her do it, if don’t then don’t do it!
No place for one to one discussions
This is something which will take you nowhere so why even think about it! It is not like your lose or anything but the fact that she is elder and has a place more predominant in the family, your one-to-one conversations will only lead to a bad impression for everyone else.
Talk to your spouse
An understanding and caring husband is capable of comforting you if you are too tensed with your Mother in Law and her constant nagging. Try and talk your fears or mental state with your husband. It is sure that he will understand and you and even give you some ideas on how to avoid things.
Try to ignore things
It is not that ignore your mother in law, no! But yes if she has constant expectations which she thinks are not getting fulfilled, I would suggest to ignore few of the things and do things in your way. Instead of worrying about each stuff she says find out ways to keep her occupied in other important things.
Don’t oblige anyone
When you tend to oblige everyone, the more they expect from you and if you keep things in the balanced way there is no question of high expectations and also no pressures to fulfill them at any cost.
Don’t complain about her
This is a strict no-no even if you feel that some of your relatives at in laws have a better understanding than your mother in law. It may happen that one day she knows about it and would feel insulted in front of her own relatives. Talk to someone whom you can confide without any doubt like your mother or sister. They will surely give you strength to deal with your mother in law with the passage of time.
Mother in Law is Important
This is something which you will realize later on if not initially. Mother in law is actually like a shield for your family and sometimes you feel if she was not there who would have told all the little details about your new family and how would you manage to quickly adapt yourself in the image of a responsible wife, daughter in law and a mother later on!
Well, this is what I have experienced and followed till now! You may or may not agree with this!